The Secrets Of Love
by alwaysandforeveryou1
Summary: Does he love me? does he even like me? Follow Fat Amy through the hard ships of overcoming a long time rivalry and finding out whose really there for her Jesse/Beca, Donald/Lily, Unicycle/Audrey,Benji/Ashley. Oh and bumper never left to be a back up singer, yet... :)
1. Chapter 1

It was the night before the ICCA and us Bella's were running through our new set again, I honestly do love this set, after Lily showed us some of her beat boxing and Beca threw together a few songs, Chloe and Aubrey immediately started on the choreography, everyone now knew their parts, we found out the Cynthia-Rose was one heck of a Rapper, we had confidence now and believe me it showed

"Alright girls, let's take a break for a minute" Aubrey said as she collapsed into a chair and the rest of us followed her actions

"We will started again in a minute" Aubrey's eyes started closing and the rest of us were not too far behind in dozing off

"Wake up!" I groaned as I heard a frantic voice and shuffling around it took me a few minutes to convince myself to open my eyes and when I did I was shocked to see the other Bella's were around me some awake and others not, I realized the frantic voice was Beca and I noticed she was now on the other side of the room and looked like she was arguing with someone on the phone

"What's going on?" I grumbled rubbing my eyes still half asleep

"We fell asleep last night and now it's almost noon" Chloe said as she watch Stacie and Lily walking around waking up the rest of the sleeping girls

"It gets better" Beca said coming over to us

"What else could go wrong?" Aubrey asked worry etched into her features

"That was the schools auto shop it seems the bus will not be ready until next week" Beca said as all the girls who were standing fell back into a chair with a defeated sigh

"So that is?" Cynthia-Rose asked looking around at all of us watching our facial expressions

"All our hard work was for nothing?" she asked again, I looked around at the girls as a plan hatched into my mind

"Chloe what time did you say it was?" I asked she looked over at my confused

"11:45, why?"

"Because I have a plan" I said as I got up and went to the other side of the room where my bag was discarded yesterday and dug threw it pulling out my cell phone, I noticed I have 3 unread messages all from the same Treble I wanted to call I glance at the messages before I call

_**Hey Amy, I haven't heard from you all day, where are you? I wanted to see you before we all left for the tournament tomorrow-bumper **_

_**The craziest thing just happened and you're gonna flip when I tell you give me a call when you can-bumper**_

_**Hey I don't know if I should be worried or not, maybe Aubrey lost her marbles and is keeping you all this late, or maybe I did something wrong, just text me when you read this so I know you're okay-bumper**_

I press the call button on his contact and wait for his voice to fill my ears

"Hello" I can't help but smile at how anxious his voice was

"Hey, where are you right now?" My smile grows bigger as I hear him let out a relaxed sigh when he hears my voice

"About to get on the bus, why? Where are you? I have been trying to get a hold of you all night" he rambles

"One question at a time" I joke but answer his questions anyways

"We were practicing real late last night and when we sat down to take a break we all just crashed we just woke up, I'm sorry did you miss your sexy Australian?" I teased he chuckled

"Maybe, now why did you want to know where I was?" he asked

"Oh yeah, gosh I almost forgot" he yet again laughed at me

"Do you think you guys could stall maybe like 30 minutes until we can get ready, our bus is broken and won't be ready until next week" I heard him sigh

"Yeah just try to get ready as fast as you can I have to spin why I want to help you to the guys" I all but squeal

"Thanks Bumper I owe you so much"

"I think we both know how that debt is going to be paid" his voice was grew deeper with his reply and I just giggled

"Go stall your boy's. I'm going to tell the girls and get ready" I said he groaned

"Okay hurry Amy I mean it" he tried to sound strict but failed

"Oh shush" was my reply as I hung up

"Okay girls the Trebles are stalling for like 30 minutes so we can get ready" I said as I came closer to them they all smiled except Aubrey

"How the heck did you manage that with that one phone call" She asked looking at me

"I just called and asked they were more than willing" I said as she smiled a little

"Well we have a ride now and pissed off Bumper because you convinced someone to give us a ride with them" I tried not to giggle in the face of how wrong she was, Bumper was who is making everyone wait, she just doesn't know it yet

"Let's just get ready" Beca said not as happy as the rest of the girls. About 20 minutes later we were all ready and walking to the bus of boys that was waiting for us

"Well this is a change in uniform" I heard Bumpers voice mocking us

"Well we decided to have fun with it" I said as equally smug as he was

"Benji Hey" Beca said smiling at Jesse's best friend and roommate as we all stepped on the bus and I took my seat in the back, with no surprise bumper sat next to me.

"Hey Beca" he smiled

"I'm a new Treble" her smile only grew to match his happiness

"I'm so happy for you, you deserve it" she said genuinely, I looked over and saw Ashley staring at Benji with a dreamy smile on her face

"Hey Ashley… what you doing?" I asked and all attention was drawn to her, while she blushed.

"Nothing" she answered quickly and she caught my eye when no one else was looking at me I winked at her saying I knew about her staring at Benji and I thought it was cute

"So why is Benji a treble now?" I whispered to Bumper when it everyone started talking

"um Chris the guy who always wore the fedora, he dropped out last night, and Jesse said he knew someone who was really good and he promised not to be weird and to top it all off he is pretty good" Bumper semi rambled I just smiled

"Wow Bumper are you really complementing someone who is not you Donald or Uni?" I gasped teasing him

"You got me going soft" he joked back

"Well I don't think that was supposed to happen" I winked at him and he laughed

"Hey I'm Fat Amy" I said looking at Benji, who smiled at me

"Yes you are" I heard Bumper Joke with Unicycle and it felt like something stabbed me in my heart

"Hey Amy, My names Benji" I tried to smiled but I still couldn't get over Bumpers comment

"It's very nice to meet you" I said so he knew it wasn't him that made my smile disappear, to be honest I loved the fact that Bumper never called me Fat Amy, it made me think he liked me and didn't want to call me something that could be insulting

"So Beca, who do you think judging by everyone on this bus is going to be the next couple?" I asked my girl best friend who was sitting diagonal from me, just like Uni was to Bumper, I knew they were listening, but Beca didn't

"Well let's see, um there's Lily and Donald" she said motioning her head to the front of the bus where Donald was driving while Lily leaned over his shoulder the both of them beat boxing with each other

"Oh they would be so cute." I said smiling she nodded

"Or Aubrey and Unicycle" I didn't expect her to say that one I look out the corner of my eyes and see Uni smirk and Bumpers face held hints of shock that you could only really see if you knew him like I did

"What about you?" she asked me I smiled as I thought of Ashley

"I have to say Ashley and Benji, or you and Jesse" her face that held a smile dropped it

"Me and Jesse?" she repeats and I nod

"Why would you say that?" she asked

"Um well beside the fact of how you to look at each other, how even though you pushed him away, he still is looking at you and smiles when you smile or the fact that the majority of our set focuses on him" I said smiling at her she blushed looking down

"Okay so what? I know you like someone on this bus" she said giving me a huge smile I glanced at bumper who seemed to stop what he was doing when he heard this

"Beca I thought I did but I don't know" I saw Bumpers face fall and felt my heart break

"What do you mean?" she asked

"he never wants to be seen with me or tell anyone about maybe kinda being with me he is the only person who has ever made me feel bad about myself or smile so much my face hurt, he always makes these rude comments and they hurt but then he has these moments where he makes me not want to be anywhere else" I wanted to cry and I guess Beca noticed because she got up and hugged me

"I think you should just talk to Hat" she said

"What?" I asked stunned, Hat? What does he have to do with anything?

"Yeah, maybe Hat is trying to impress Bumper, so he's acting weird with you?" she said sincerely

"Aca-cuse me" I said in quoting Aubrey

"Yeah, I mean Bumper's their leader, they follow his every command, what do you think Bumper would say if Hat started to date you" well a whole hell of a lot more then you do obviously

"Um Beca the guy I was talking about isn't hat" I wanted to tell her it was Bumper, but I couldn't

"Really?" she asked shocked and I kind of chuckled

"Yeah Bec, I don't even think I've had a real conversation with him…ever"

"But I saw you looking all love sick at him at semi- regionals, when he was standing next to… Bumper" I looked down as it all started to click into place

"That's why you have Bumpers number on speed dial, and how you got the boys to wait for us this morning" I looked back up at her and nodded I was thankful of the busy noise in the bus, no one but Me, Bumper, Beca and Unicycle could hear anything

"So what are you doing for summer vacation?" she asked trying to change the subject

"Nothing" I said and sighed

"Wait you're not going home?" she asked and I looked at her confused

"To Australia, no me and my sister don't really get along so I'm not really invited home" I said

"Wait you have a sister?" Beca asked shocked and I shook my head

"Yeah she is the one who started this whole 'fat Amy' thing well her and all the 'plastics', she's 2 years older than me and apparently beautiful everyone loved her more and she rubbed it in so when I could finally get away from it all I did I moved out of the country for heaven's sake"

"Wow so you're gonna stay here all alone?" she asked and I smiled and nodded

"How about you?" I asked her

"Well I see my dad the whole school year so I'm going to my mom's house in Michigan"

"Speaking of your dad is him and his wife coming tonight?" I asked and she gave me a pointed look

"What was that look about?" I asked laughing

"Nothing just thinking of the step monster" I doubled over in laughter

"Step monster that's great" she smiled at me and giggled a little

"But yeah they are both coming, why?" she asked looking at me with curiosity

"Well I was thinking about that boob move we do and how weird that would be for you and your dad" I said laughing again but also noticing Bumper and Uni staring at us, she just smirked at me and I laughed, I felt bumpers hand rub up against my leg in a way no one would notice, so I moved away, a little closer to Beca, he tried again and I once again moved away, I thought he had finally given up until I felt my phone vibrate

_**What did I do? - Bumper**_

I ignored it and tried to focus on the oncoming battle, Bella's vs. the Trebles, we might have lost a few battles but we were about to win the war

_**How can you possibly be mad at me right now? –Bumper **_

I caved and texted him back

_**How could I not be mad at you Bumper, it's always some mean joke with you – Amy**_

_**Are you talking about what I said to uni when you introduced yourself to Benji? –Bumper**_

_**You just can't help yourself can you? You don't care; you don't care about me or my feelings, it's all one big joke to you – Amy **_

_**You know that's not true or at least you should, but your upset because I made a comment about you, and I get it I mean kind of, it's just what we do though Amy we make these stupid digs at each other and you were fine with it up until now – Bumper**_

_**You've never called me FAT before – Amy**_

_**Baby is that what this is about? I'm sorry, I didn't mean it I was just putting on a show, gosh, I think you're beautiful, and I hate myself for messing with this confident perfection, because that's how I see you, Perfect and I wouldn't change anything about you –Bumper **_

I felt tears sting my eyes and glanced over at him, his features were dusted with worry as he stared intensely waiting for my reply, I wanted to believe him I did, but I just don't know if I can anymore…

_**Prove it –Amy **_

I heard his phone vibrate as he got my finale message, if you look at me you don't see how I really feel you won't see that my humor covers up how insecure I am, I hate to show this side of me, but sometimes I can't suppress it. Normally when this side barges out I stay in my dorm with tissues and really sad movies, the only person who has ever seen this side of me was… Bumper, but I don't even know if he likes me platonically let alone romantically.

_**(A.N- so I want to start by saying happy Easter :D and I also wanted to say that this is a multi- chapter story, and I really like Reviews C: but review or not I would like to thank you for reading this and to top this all of I would just like to say I own nothing, all credit goes to the wonderful creators of Pitch Perfect, thanks guys)**_


	2. Chapter 2

"Whoa.! We kicked butt.!" I hear myself scream but i hardly recognize my voice, on the inside i fell incomplete, yeah we beat the guys, and yeah, we were fantastic, but i can't celebrate like Beca, my lips can't be pressed against the guy I'm secretly falling for, I'm his secret... The words felt dirty and gross as i thought them up.

"Amy, Hey, Amyyyyy" i heard Cynthia-rose yell

"yeah?" my vice came out forced and weak, maybe even a little fragile

"you alright baby girl?" I tried to smile at the thought of being hit on by a girl, or Cynthia-rose for that matter, i felt bumper tense up, personality the Nieve insecure girl i am deep down inside would like to believe it was because the thought of me maybe not being okay, that it worried and painted him to his core, heck I'd even take the option where he tensed up because someone beside himself was 'taking an interest' in me, but i doubt I'll ever know.

"ummm, aca- cuse, why wouldn't i be? We just won.!" My voice imitating that of Aubry

"Hey, i don't sound like that" Aubry yelled from her spot on the crowded bus with a smile on her face

"then how did you know it was you.?" I asked a fake smile making a presences on my face, i could do this... I've pretended to be okay my whole life, what makes now so different?

BUMPER

The answer flashed into my head as soon as the question had appeared, bumper made this different, with his harsh honesty and self centered behavior, his beautiful soul and soft forgiving eyes, his ability to make me forget the need i had to pretend, to him, to the world, to myself

_**You were marvelous up there tonight, I'd lose a thousand more times if that meant i got to sit back and watch beauty at it's best- bumper**_

My phone lit up, and as i read his message i tried to keep telling myself that he just wanted me in his bed tonight, but it didn't work. To me bumper had a way with words, everything that wasn't rudely pointed at me, i thought was perfect, i keep falling in his trap, time after time, but this time i have to show him, and myself, that I'm worth being shown to the world I'm better than just being someones secret, so i replied back the only way i could think of

_**You didn't lose you came in 2nd- Amy**_

As i send my message, i can't help but think how cold it really was, he called me beautiful, he said he was grateful to lose if it meant to me...and i come back with... You came in 2nd?! He's going to leave me, he's going to leave me and find someone better, not keep them a secret, possibly love them forever, i felt my eyes water at the thought... How could i go on with out him? Without my confidence...because that's what he is, lover, friend, confidence..

_**You know what i meant, don't be that way, i hate when your mad at me... Sexy **__**Australian, please, just tell me what to do to fix this-bumper **_

My phone went off and i looked down at my phone i looked past the tears that blurred my vision and snorted to myself

_**I already did...PROVE IT- Amy **_

I respond and wait for a text back, hoping something will give me hope, that he's in this as much as i am, turning my phone around and upside down, glancing at Jesse and Beca my phone vibrated alerting me of a new message

_**How can i prove it if your pushing me away?-bumper**_

My hands moved like wild fire against the keyboard of my cellphone

_**PUSHING YOU AWAY?! Gosh bumper I'm not pushing you away I'm holding on for dear life.! But your not gonna prove it by a few sweet words, I'm sorry- Amy**_

Part of me was very proud of myself after i sent the message, but the other, louder, part of me is worried, wondering if i keep being this cold to him how long this will last... Maybe he deserved this, maybe I'm over reacting, maybe the sky will fall, maybe I'll have steak for dinner, i could do this maybe this all day, but as i sat on the bus surrounded by laughter and excitement from my friends and the trebles, i couldn't help but notice just like myself...Bumper wasn't apart of it either


End file.
